Fifa Board Member Roast

[Darko Iulo]

this can be funny if you want it to be. I'm not gonna make it funny. Say something about every member of the board that you always wanted but couldn't because of gfaqs mods.

Sephi: You are a fucking retard. How you manange to put together a sentence is a miracle itself.

Hardman: You are a dumbass that only cheers for the team that's winning.

Liquid: You're a sack of shit and probably smell like one too.

Skoop: I take back what I said about Sephi. You're the retard.

Gothic: I imagine you sweat a lot while bitching about every fucking call that. The ref makes. Shut the fuck up you. crying fuck face.

Gunner:

Deese: You are ok.

Hazy: You moron. You idiot. You are the most biased fan of anybody on this board.

Terra: You scouse prick.

Tuna: What up?

bionic: You're Indian. Speaks for itself really.

Claude: Idk man. You're not that stupid. Good job. I have nothing to say about you.

Mafew: You were cooler when you were the most underrated poster. Since you've became a regular poster you have turned into a big anus.

Eddie: you support a shit club in a shit town with a shit manager with shit players. I don't mean to be mean but I guess we have never had any interaction so I felt I should include you. Idiot.

if I didn't add you it means you are so stupid my brain has wiped any memory of you from my brain or I think you're alright.

[tuna che culo]

i didnt know matt won an underrated poster

but yes definitely went right to his head

Spoiler:

[tuna che culo]

i would be happy to add but i dont pay attention enough

i pretty much just type out my own post, laugh at that, close the thread

[Mafewww]

Yeah, I never won shit.

That went to bernabau or some shitter like that.

[Stam]

I must be alright then yaa

This topic is a keeper. Now I really want all the retards to join.

[tuna che culo]

pretty much a redo of my ruthless 3000-people-saw-this thread but yeah whatever

[Claude]

Cba saying everyone but the gist is I like most people there bar some annoyances but can't stand the likes of hardman/saiyen/liquid, mind numbing reading their posts

[Sk00p]

This is how retarded John Locke is, he posts about Bionic even though no one has seen him in like a year.

No one really cares what you think you stupid Bosnian cunt, stupid plastic

[Mafewww]

This is how retarded John Locke is, he posts about Bionic even though no one has seen him in like a year.

No one really cares what you think you stupid Bosnian cunt, stupid plastic

I endorse this post.

[Hazy]

Hazy: You moron. You idiot. You are the most biased fan of anybody on this board.

shut the fuck up, stannis

[Hazy]

nard, you're actually not a retard when we're not talking about football.

when we're talking about porto's and shit, you're a pretty cool bro.

and we bro out and bond and it's pretty cool.

[Darko Iulo]

nard, you're actually not a retard when we're not talking about football.

when we're talking about porto's and shit, you're a pretty cool bro.

and we bro out and bond and it's pretty cool.

Great burn. That's how it is done everyone.

[Darko Iulo]

And for the record I may or may not have been fully in control of my brain when I made this.

[NathanLS7]

Terra: You scouse prick.

lool

I have alot of catching up to do on this board.

[tuna che culo]

let the hazing commence

[Hazy]

Fucking change your sig, Nate.

[Claude]

Quality sig

[NathanLS7]

Fucking change your sig, Nate.

This better...

[TheSappy1314]

This is how retarded John Locke is, he posts about Bionic even though no one has seen him in like a year.

No one really cares what you think you stupid Bosnian cunt, stupid plastic

I endorse this post.

I endorse both of these posts. This would've been my roast

[Hazy]

Fucking change your sig, Nate.

This better...

No link and no gifs, a simple .jpg would do.

[LiquidFuze]

I've made a few additions/amendments


Hey, I'm gonna "roast" people too. I actually always wanted to do this, but I never got a chance in HS because I was on the receiving end. I'll say something mean first and then something nice second. In no particular order:

Mafewww: The day you were born the doctor said: "Oh my god, there's a cunt coming out of a cunt's cunt!"
But you are very knowledgable on Italian football and your little bouts of extreme rage always assure me I'm posting on the right forum.

Gothic: Honestly, I'm not exactly sure what your gender is. I vaguely remember someone (I think Val) referring to you as a female and after that I've always avoided making distasteful jokes about women. I'm not really sure why a girl would follow football as much as you do and then post on a forum (especially the 360 board...) with a bunch of cunts. So the worst part of this is that even if you are a dude, I'll probably still remember you as a chick. Also the fuck kind of name is Gothic Tease? Sounds like a porn Selphi would get off to.
Despite your gender, you're a nice poster and helps retain the sanity of the board and balance out the crazy.

Selphi: You have more social networking profiles than any male or female I know. You spend more time posting about your life than actually living it, boom roasted.
But you're a nice guy and you're fun to have around. The FIFA board would just not be the same without you. People tease you, but inside they care, really.

Claude: You support Liverpool. Boom roasted. Actually, I have another joke. If you're driving in Liverpool and you see a fan on a bike, you should swerve and hit him because it's probably your bike.
But seriously, you're another cool chap who's sort of laid-back and is usually nice/respectful to others. Help maintain the sanity of the board.

sk00p: You're a racist psychopath. Like, you have probably killed someone and dumped the body and never told anyone. I don't have anything positive to say about you since you keep trying to manipulate/troll me.

bionic: Bionic, lol, Deepak. Hahahahaha.
But you seemed like a nice guy when I first started posting. I'm sorry sk00p ruined it. I wish you posted more but since you don't I assume you died in one of the many political riots in our country.

Cheese: Honestly, nothing negative to say. Always nice to me from the beginning, his posts are refreshing and he's an all around cool chap. He's actually so nice that at times I've wondered if he likes men. Regardless, you're the best.  Amended, total cunt up there with the likes of Stalin and Rafael Nadal.

Val Jester: You're Black and you support Liverpool. What ship has never docked at Liverpool? The Premiereship, LOL.
But...you have great taste in movies and I know deep down all that negativity, you're a nice guy (probably).

Gunner: Jesus, you talk about Arsenal so much I think you have a 24 hour wire up Wenger's cunt or something. I really hope you're a local fan and you go to most of their matches. Probably hoping you'll die in a car crash before you get there.
NAH, you're one of my favorite posters (no homo). Never that much of a douche, pretty chill, and zealous in your support. Also one more: A woman asked her husband "Which shopping center is the best in England, dear?" The man replied "Arsenal FC." Boom, after-post roasted.

T3rra: You are so unoriginal and boring that you pretended to be me. On that matter, I'm not an alt, seriously.
Just kidding, you're an awesome guy and should post more. Stop making fun of Barcelona.

Three Eyed Crow: You're actually a good poster and a nice guy! Nothing negative to think of. Which probably means you're boring or something depending on the interpretation. Hm. l0l

abdou: You're a degenerate, probably haven't showered in days and I wouldn't trust you with my kids. So basically a Liverpool fan. Boom! Oops sort of roasted Claude again lol. Why is it so much fun to mock Liverpool??

saiyen: For saiyen, allow me to quote an excerpt from Les Miserables: ""The peasants of the Asturias believe that in every litter of wolves there is one dog, which is killed by the mother, lest on growing up it should devour the other little ones. Give a human face to this dog son of a wolf, and you will have saiyen."
But you support Barcelona and you're my go-to-guy for discussing La Liga.

St Bernabau: I don't want to say anything harsh about Bernabeu since he's had a difficult, trophy-less season.
Despite you supporting the ultimate rivals, you''re nice to have banter with and recognize the greatness that is La Liga.

EvilMeatball: You are so bland I don't even know what to say.
But when you do post, you're a cool bloke so post more!

hardman: One day I was playing Skyrim and I found a dog in this swampy area. He looked disturbed, hungry, and emaciated. Taking pity on him, I struck him down with my sword. You are that dog.
But if you really aren't an alt, you're fun to have around and we enjoy your company! Despite of your...occasionally ludicrous opinions.

Yiddosrule: I could simply make a boring race joke here, but it's unnecessary as your atrocious personality can easily fill that gap.
Just kidding, it's entertaining to see you argue with other posters and when you aren't arguing, you seem like a chill guy.

joe greezy: You are a faggot. I don't want you to critique my UT. You always seem to somehow bring Ultimate Team into every topic. "So yeah, this new girl from work..." joe greezy: "D3OS SH3 HAV PA33EEEEEE11??"
Also, you seem grumpy all the time. Lighten up bro, it's just a internet forum.


Well, that's all. I know there are more users, but I just did who came first and who I've actually interacted with. I hope no one takes any of this too seriously. To be honest, this board is the closest thing I've had to friends.

L0L, jk!!

[Claude]

Thanks man!  

[tuna che culo]

what the fuck did you say about me muhammad you filthy goat-fucking poon? how about i force feed you a barrel of your grandmothers special chilli-mud and have a bull fuck you up the arse to keep it in your intestines until they fucking boil? maybe when he is done you'll be pregnant with one of your precious fucking cows, that i eat a piece of nearly every goddamn day btw. i couldnt think of a dumber fucking animal to worship, you come from a long line of retarded alinigger tuskan-raiders and the line isnt stopping with you. so just keep working in your shitty taxi while you're on a long distance call with some other towelhead faggot talking your babba bindu bubu bullshit, sitting on your curry-burned arsehole, making just enough money to afford renting a couple of shit-stained walls in your parents dilapidated dirt shack. thats right, abdul and sanjay, your clit-chopped whore mother and your autistic snake-charmer father, stopping in at 7/11 to talk to habib about how ganesh gave ghandi magic powers through the tip of its eight cocks, trying to bargain down the price of a new head rag. i hope for your sake that dot on your head is a fucking self-destruct button you waste of life, sandnigger pakicunt.

[LiquidFuze]

...........

[Mafewww]

top fucking percentage

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